The Holy Land Burial

[M22KLARS]

A Man, his wife, and mother-in-law went on vacation to the Holy Land. While they were there the mother-in-law passed away. The undertaker told them, “You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here in the Holy Land for $150.”
The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.
The undertaker asked, “Why? Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your mother-in-law home, when it would be wonderful to spend only $150?”
The man said, “A man died here nearly 2000 years ago, he was buried here and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can’t take that chance.”

 

[05Mudiak]

:giggle:

 

[3Hummers]

An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old
man passes gas and says, 'Seven Points.'
His wife rolls over and says,'what in the world was that?'
The old man replied, 'its fart football.'
A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says,'Touchdown,
tie score.'
After about five minutes, the old man lets another one go and
says, 'Aha. I'm ahead 14 to 7.'
Not to be outdone the wife rips out another one and says,
'Touchdown, tie score.'
Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says,
'Field goal, I lead 17 to 14.' Now the pressure is on the old man.
He refuses to get beaten by a woman, so he strains real hard.
Since defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything
he's got and accidentally ****s in the bed.
The wife says, 'What the hell was that?'
The old man says, 'Half time, switch sides.'